While dance competitions may look glamorous to the outsider the old paraphrased maxim is very true when loosely applied to such events here in Malaysia: all that glisters is not a gold medal performance.
After much thought The Lawrence Committee For The Moving Of Various Lawrence Children Around The Country To Do A Range Of Challenging Activities decided that it was in the interests off all concerned that just Edwin and I would depart for the grandly titled 12th National Ballroom and Latin Competition in Penang immediately after school on Friday and tackle what we could of the 220 mile journey in the light and, hopefully non raining times. This was because Rupert was spending Friday on a school day trip to Kuantan, a mere 150 miles away from KL and was not due back until 5.30pm. That put pay to all Lawrences going to Penang for the weekend, due to wanting to arrive in Penang on the same day that we departed. Rupert's trip also necessitated a 5.30am drop off at school. Not wishing to go into the office at that ridiculous hour I went for a ridiculous run instead, of all things, before work.
End of school came and Edwin arrived at the Dramaland office to depart. All was well and we headed to the car. He then headed back into school to collect the library books that he had forgotten and then we set off straight into after school traffic jams. The long trek north proceeded well, despite the predicted torrential rainy season storms and bizarre driving styles of fellow motorists. I really must ask our marvellous mechanic to check the rear of our Hyundai to see if there is an extremely powerful magnet wedged in the bumper. Time and again motorists found themselves within inches of our bumper as we charged north. I did my best to get out of their way although I do feel that I ought to apologize for the colourful language and middle finger exercises that I resorted to all too often. The only other hold-ups on the journey were caused by several car accidents where drivers appeared to have driven into the back of other cars.
We got off the Penang Bridge at 8.30pm and arrived at our hotel at 10.00pm thanks to various problems. The Georgetown City Hotel is on Jalan Burma, not Jalan Burmah as it boasts on its website and after that correction finding it was still tricky. The journey from bridge to hotel is only 10 miles but thanks to loads of traffic, a one way system that the sat nav did not recognise and the hotel not being anywhere close to where a bloke in a differently named hotel told us we took ages to get there. The irony of the hotel's name change was not lost on The Boy Lawrence and I. It had previously been known as Berjaya Georgetown Hotel, with berjaya roughly translating as 'success.' Could it have been the would be guests lack of success finding the place that forced a name change? Tired out we slept.
Open practice for the competition started at 7.00am as the first event was timetabled for 8.00am. I have been to a few more dance competitions than I ever thought I would in KL and beyond and usually these events start late, get later across the day and finish at unearthly late hours. Being the 12th Annual event the rigidly timed schedule in the glossy programme looked frighteningly efficient and promised much in a very authoritarian way. We made sure we were on time, especially as the first of Edwin's four events started at 8.36am, precisely. At 7.50am the floor was cleared of sequined and shining competitors, old and young, and ... four blokes, and their tie wearing boss, arrived and started examining the dance floor. The floor was made up of metre square, wooden effect, interlocking tiles laid on top of a plush carpet. The blokes began to lift up the floor tiles things did not look good for an 8.00am start. While some of the four blokes lifted up several floor tiles other blokes bashed tiles together with a suitable tool. Meanwhile another man wearing a tie arrived. This man had a clipboard. Things did not look good. There was more bashing, more clipboards, four rolls of red gaffer tape, an important lady in an important dress, and then, when all the red tape had been used up, white tape arrived. A different man, wearing white shoes, came and kicked the floor tiles.
8.36am came and went, as did 9.00am and all the precious minutes until 9.30am, when the floor was declared suitable for dancing on and a start could be made, one and a half hours late. The problem was apparently that the floor tiles had moved apart while the dancers were practising. The glossily photoed in the programme and grinning organisers had not thought it necessary to test the floor for its suitability for dancing on, I mean it was only a dance competition after all. The three serious looking characters listed as "Advisors" clearly had not offered any useful hints like "Will the flooring be safe to use?" or "Should you think about getting the floor ready the day before the competition?"
So we were under way, eventually. Edwin danced well and clearly enjoyed himself and the floor problems were soon forgotten about. (I wonder if the organisers, advisors, committee members and tie wearers will forget about the floor for the 13th Annual event?). By 10.20am Edwin's dancing was done and we just had time to dash down to the hotel's restaurant for a bash at the buffet breakfast, which did stop serving on-time at 10.30.
After breakfast we returned to the ballroom and asked when the results would be announced. The ticket sellers did not know. The people in charge of registration for the competition did not know. The chief adjudicator, who was also a main sponsor and guest of honour did not know either. The glossy programme said that there would be a prize ceremony at 9.48pm, but given the late running of the whole thing and the 170 classes that were due to take place before that I did not fancy waiting around.
Somehow or other, at around 12.45pm, the results stared to come through. To help speed things along Edwin and I helped unwrap the plastic covers from the Olympic style podium blocks for the placed dancers and a non tie wearing bloke stared calling out numbers of dancers and dishing out medals and certificates. Edwin did well and, bless him, won all four of the solo under 12 events that he entered. Good on you son. (It should be noted that there were seven competitors dancing at the same time as Edwin: six under 12s and one over 35. To help the judges identify the dancers correctly the MC asked the over 35 lady to raise her hand before the dancing began.)
To celebrate I took Edwin off to Escape for the rest of the afternoon. Escape is a splendid high ropes course and outdoor activity, climbing and dashing around place and it was just what we both needed to do to let off plenty of steam and sweat after the dance competition. On the way back to the hotel we had a dip in the warm sea and then, after washing the Melaka Strait off of ourselves we ate fine Thai inspired Penang food. I even managed to persuade the lad to try a spoonful of laksa.
Shattered we begin the journey back south after breakfast tomorrow, slightly heavier about the medal front and slightly wiser about flooring.